


I Hate You (But Thank You, Thank You)

by raendown



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 11:02:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11439510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raendown/pseuds/raendown
Summary: "What onearthare you wearing?"





	I Hate You (But Thank You, Thank You)

Madara stopped walking only two steps in to their apartment, the door swinging shut behind him with an ominous snapping sound.

“What on _earth_ are you wearing?” he asked in a flat voice.

From the other side of the living room, Tobirama gave him a singularly unimpressed look, crossing his arms and raising one eyebrow.

“Why don’t you ask your brother, while he still has his head?” the man replied, dripping venom with every word. Madara took a slow, calming breath in.

“Do I want to know what Izuna has to do with you getting dressed in… _that_?”

He was fascinated to see his roommate’s cheeks flush a deep shade of pink. Originally Madara had lived with Hashirama and Tobirama had moved in with them ‘temporarily’ when he came back to town after university. Then Hashirama had moved in with his girlfriend, leaving the both of them alone in their downtown apartment. For two people who had spent their childhood professing “ultra-mega-forever-to-infinity hatred” for each other, they managed to get along surprisingly well.

Which is how Madara found himself in the predicament of living with his best friend’s younger brother, somehow madly in love with said younger brother, yet unable to say anything.

And Izuna knew that. Madara told his own younger brother everything. That, of course, meant that he was going to violently murder his own sibling when he found out what he had done which led to Senju Tobirama standing in their living room wearing nothing but a red satin nightie – one which seemed to be perfectly shaped to accentuate the male physique. It was edged with black lace and fell only just far enough that if Tobirama turned around his pert little tushie would be barely covered. Madara’s brain took a dive straight for the gutter and wondered how his roommate was containing his genitals. Surely even flaccid he should be peeping out the bottom, flashing a little skin beneath the lace?

Tobirama cleared his throat pointedly and Madara snapped his eyes back up, realizing that he had been staring at the sight before him for probably much too long. His own cheeks flushed to match the younger man’s and they both awkwardly looked away from each other.

“He had it _planned_ ,” Tobirama growled. Madara found his gaze sliding inexorably back over to him, drinking in the incredible sight before him while he could. He would likely never have a chance like this again.

“Planned?” he asked. Tobirama grunted.

“Him and some friends,” he said. “He showed up and invited me out to the movies, insisted I shower before we go. The moment I was in the shower he let in a whole gang of his friends and they took every scrap of clothing out of the apartment. Mine, yours, the bath towels. They even took the bedsheets! And the blankets! _Off the beds_!” He seemed to forget his embarrassment for a moment as his anger was stoked anew. He made irritated gestures that shifted the red satin against his chest, causing Madara’s mouth to go dry.

“Uh huh…” He considered himself lucky that Tobirama seemed too distracted to hear the tiny breathy sounds that he made or notice the way his eyes were glued to the lacy edges of fabric.

“All that was left in the entire apartment were dish towels and _this_. As mortifying as this is it covers more than a dish towel and it at least stays in place. Besides, I had to use all but two of those just to dry myself after I got out of the shower. So I hope you don’t really truly love your brother all that much because I am going to eviscerate him. Slowly. With a _smile_.”

Madara swallowed harshly and prayed that Tobirama wouldn’t notice how tight his trousers had become. “I will cheerfully assist,” he said.

Tobirama grunted at him again and the two of them fell in to silence, unsure of what to say in this ridiculously awkward situation. Madara felt honor bound to at least offer the man his shirt. The long tails would probably cover more than that skimpy little scrap he was currently wearing. He couldn’t make himself do it though. How could he cover up such decadence?

Both of them stiffened with a phone began to ring, the landline that they barely ever used. They’d been talking about getting rid of it since both of them usually used their cellphones for everything but never gotten around to it. Neither of them moved to answer it now, staring at each other from across the room and just letting it ring and ring.

Finally the ancient answering machine picked up and Madara could hear his own voice grumpily _daring_ whoever was on the other line to leave a message. A loud beep screeched in his ears and then, after a few seconds of muffle chortling, he narrowed his eyes at the sound of Izuna’s voice.

“Hey Madaraaaaa!” his brother greeted him with a sing-song voice. “You always get home around this time and I’m guessing you’ve found poor old Tobes by now. Did you like your present? I wrapped him up all nice and pretty for you!” Tobirama gave him a quizzical look and Madara turned to stare at the answering machine in betrayal, his face suddenly a deeper shade of red than Tobirama’s nightie. “It would be _really_ great for, like, everyone else if you two would just confess to each other already and bone it out. Seriously. The sexual tension in that apartment is so thick I have to swim through it every time I visit. Have fun boys. Ta!”

A quick second of more muffled laughter and then the machine clicked to signify that the message was finished recording. Silence settled over the room as Madara continued to stare off in to the distance, mentally planning Izuna’s doom. He flinched when Tobirama shifted, almost expecting to have something thrown at his head.

“It appears your brother is of the opinion that you are attracted to me,” Tobirama said. Madara’s eyes widened but he kept his head turned, awaiting the inevitable rejection. “If it’s true that would be terribly convenient as I happen to be, ah, rather attracted to you as well.”

“You what now?” Madara’s head whipped around so fast he felt something _click_ in his neck but the pain barely registered. The sight of Tobirama nearly punched him in the gut again. In the two minutes he had looked away it was like he had forgotten just how delicious he looked. Tobirama smirked at him and it changed the entire picture, somehow making him look even hotter. The younger man set his hands on his hips and cocked his head to one side.

“I said that I am attracted to you.” He had a lot of confidence for a man wearing lingerie. “And I asked how you feel in return.”

Madara would later blame it on the blood that was rushing southward, away from his brain, which caused him to blurt out, “I’m so fucking in love with you!”

That brought Tobirama up short. He blinked, smirk disappearing with a startled look. Then he blushed prettily and his mouth tilted up in a pleased smile.

“Oh,” he said quietly. “I…feel the same.”

Madara felt his head nodding reflexively but the rest of him felt numb with shock. He couldn’t believe it; his feelings were actually returned? Not just physical attraction but Tobirama was actually in love with him? He felt almost high with relief and wonderment. He felt like he could bench press their entire apartment building. He…was on the wrong side of the room.

“What the hell am I still doing standing over here then?” he growled aloud. Tobirama bit his lip in amusement as Madara stalked across their living room to pull the younger man in to his arms, hands sliding on red silk to reach down and grip his favorite perky little bottom. Tobirama moaned as his neck immediately came under assault. He shifted in Madara’s hold, pulling his shirt out of his belt in an effort to even the playing field.

“It is extremely unfair that you’re wearing so many more clothes than I am,” he noted. “Take them off.”

Madara would have replied except his exploring fingers had just discovered something interesting. Something that nearly collapsed his knees and left him to worship Tobirama from the bottom up.

“You’re wearing _panties_ ,” he choked. Tobirama snorted.

“They came with the outfit. I was a little too exposed without them.”

“After I kill Izuna I am going to buy him every gift he has ever wanted.”

Tobirama had no time for a response because Madara took his lips in a vicious kiss then, licking his way inside that snarky mouth while he guided the younger man backwards towards one of their bedrooms – he wasn’t sure which one but he was very sure he didn’t care. He was a little too preoccupied to give attention to such silly details. He had his hands full at the moment, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> I will never forgive cellphones for taking over and making the confession-by-loud-answering-machine trope irrelevant.


End file.
